Chapter 116 - Wizard May Cry (2)

In any case, sylph speech patterns aside.

As one of the Four Elementals, they had my interest.

Granted, that wind output had help from the grimoire <The King in Yellow>, but still....

"Impressive."

I walked past the dissipating Shadow Serpent and approached Se-geon.

"What terms did you contract with the sylphs on?"

Se-geon let out a sigh laced with leftover tension, relieved it was over, and said,

"Well, I used the word 'contract' for convenience's sake, but... it's less that I give them orders and more that they grant my requests, I guess?"

Se-geon gave an awkward laugh, watching the sylphs drifting around him.

"They call me 'Master' sometimes, but it's less genuine respect and more teasing me whenever the mood strikes. It feels like a contract between equals, like friends."

I gave the sylphs a quick once-over.

"Hmmm~ So could they get friendly with me too?"

Considering how contracting with the gnomes, earth elementals, had toughened my body as a passive effect, contracting with other elementals couldn't hurt.

And so.

The moment I finished speaking, two sylphs flew over, circled round and round me, then

"Kufufu~."

"Giggle giggle~."

exchanged glances with each other in midair and started laughing.

"No~ way~ His eyes are mean~ Scary~."

"Not my type~ He's got a bland face~."

They chattered and sneered with innocent, impish little faces.

"He looks like he'd put a collar on a girl and whip her~."

"He looks like he'd kill someone while smiling~."

Whether my looks suited their taste or not was their business, so that part didn't bother me.

But at the sylph brats' baseless, brainless slander, my eyes narrowed at once.

'No, seriously, what do they mean, I'd kill someone while smiling?'

What exactly did they take me for? Sure, I'd killed people, but killing while smiling....

".........."

...For a moment, the past flickered through my mind.

Come to think of it.

I had cracked jokes and laughed while killing Chairman Kim.

No, but back then, people were trying to kill me from every direction and my house was burning down, so that was more of a hollow, drained laugh.

And there was also that time I laughed looking at Kim Mi-ryeo's headless corpse, the leftovers of Grizzly's meal.

No, but that was also more of a self-deprecating laugh at how absurd the situation was... Forget it.

The tension drained from my brow and eyes.

"Haah...."

Damn Chairman Kim and his family. No help at all.

And then.

"Shaaaah! Take that back, gnome!"

A gnome shouted, swinging its adorable little fists up in the air.

"Master is the best Master, gnome! He gives us lots of praise! And lots and lots of yummy snacks, gnome!"

The sylphs giggled, looking down at the worked-up gnome,

"Fufu~ Fine then, we take~ it~ back~."

"Kyahaha~."

then flew back over to Se-geon and said, floating around him,

"Anyway, we're not playing with the bad wizard mister. We're playing with the nice human mister~."

"Heroes and wizards are wicked men who seduce innocent nymphs, make them all long and big, and take them as brides~."

"If he keeps talking to us, we're calling an elemental lawyer~."

My eyes blinked on their own.

'...What's an elemental lawyer?'

Well, given that the gnomes had picked up a fair bit of modern knowledge, the sylphs were probably just parroting things they'd overheard somewhere too.

And whether I counted as some great hero, I couldn't say.

But I could understand the sylphs being on guard against bad men—or whatever.

The nymphs of Greek mythology, their originals, had plenty of stories of causing trouble themselves, but plenty more of suffering between gods and human heroes.

The classic example would be Paris from the tale of the Trojan War, maybe?

He fell head over heels for Helen, Greece's greatest beauty (not a maiden, a married woman), whom Aphrodite paired him with, and completely forgot Oenone, the devoted nymph wife he already had.

In any case, a contract with the sylphs was hardly urgent.

No need to force it.

And it was time to wrap up the job.

Through the crack of the door, our client Rikoriko's manager, Seo Ye-eun, cautiously emerged.

"U-um... is it resolved?"

I turned around and, playing the professional, spoke in a calm voice.

"Yes, it's been fully resolved."

Both the test of the grimoire <The King in Yellow> and the job itself were a success.

.

.

.

Afterward, Jeong Si-u thanked us profusely and paid a fee that was generous within reason.

Popular VTubers really did make good money, huh?

Well, judging by the look in his manager Seo Ye-eun's eyes, the fee probably included hush money, but I'd never planned on spreading it around anyway, so it didn't matter.

Though one of his viewers had gone and found out that Rikoriko was a man.

".........."

It was evening, and we'd taken a private room at a restaurant for dinner and a little celebration.

I glanced at Se-geon and said,

"Should I have gotten you Rikoriko's autograph or something?"

"Huh? ...No, I'm good."

Se-geon looked briefly flustered, then eased into that gentle, good-natured smile of his.

"It'd put him in an awkward spot to know one of his viewers was in the room."

After a brief silence, Se-geon spoke carefully.

"Truth is, my hearing got sharper after contracting with the sylphs, so I heard everything said inside the office. Finding out Rikoriko was a man was a shock, but..."

Se-geon looked over at Rikoriko's stream, which Lee Mun-ryong had pulled up on his laptop.

"...I was still glad to see he takes his streams seriously."

[Surprised I went live all of a sudden? I'm feeling way better, so here I am! Time for a surprise part two~!]

"Because it's true that Rikoriko's streams picked me back up whenever I was feeling down."

"Hmm...."

Well, if the viewer himself felt that way, it was none of my concern.

At least it seemed I wouldn't be getting any angry phone calls from Rikoriko's manager.

Se-geon smiled down at the grimoire <The King in Yellow> resting on the table.

"It's a dangerous power, but... it makes me happy to think I can use it to help other people."

".........."

My eyes narrowed slightly.

As a suitably sized Anomaly Incident, it had made for a good test of the grimoire, but....

'...Happy that he can help people, huh.'

But as Se-geon's first job, it might not have been such a good thing.

After all, this line of work wasn't all clean jobs of driving off wicked Anomalies and helping poor, kindhearted souls.

And that do-gooder mindset of helping others was dangerous in the first place.

At the end of the day, this was about taking payment and resolving a commission.

If he couldn't tell which matters to stick his nose into and which to stay out of, and kept charging in headfirst to help, he'd be dead in no time.

".........."

Wait? Then maybe that was good news for me.

If Se-geon died, all I had to do was pick up <The King in Yellow> where it fell.

So, in preparation for that day.

I figured I might as well start slowly seducing it now, and shot <The King in Yellow> a covert look.

Yellow?

<The King in Yellow> tilted a corner of its cover at Yo-han's gaze.

<De Vermis Mysteriis>, <The Lesser Key of Solomon>, <Baopuzi>

Maybe it was just my grimoires, but... grimoires seemed to like the rofan male-lead style. [TL: rofan, the Korean romance-fantasy webnovel genre]

I made eye contact with a gaze of cold possessiveness, and smiled softly where no one else could see.

I created a secret just between the two of us.

Yellow-!?

<The King in Yellow> startled and looked around, but there were no other grimoires present.

...Y-Yelloow.

To already own three grimoires and still throw such shameless advances at another one.

...He was a dangerous wizard.

***

Morning at Ellie's Church.

Soaking in the peaceful morning atmosphere, I had a simple breakfast of toast and salad.

I bit into my crispy toast to the now-familiar sounds of the orphans chattering at a reasonable volume, Ellie's voice as she looked after the kids, Soo-ah's yawns, and the morning news playing on the TV.

Crunch-.

".........."

And here, a sip of milk.

Mmm... the strawberry jam spread gently through my mouth.

A good sweetness. This was good.

A truly calm, pleasant morning.

The Special Operations Division had to keep Yoannis in check, so in effect they were leaving me alone.

And Yoannis had gone to ground to avoid the Special Operations Division, so he wasn't coming after me either.

If either faction attacked me, the other would strike at the opening and take the advantage.

The Longzhong Plan. A cauldron standing on three legs.

...Well, of those legs, my faction was the weakest, and it was a peace that could shatter at any moment.

Either way, as things stood, unless I suddenly stirred up trouble, the Special Operations Division wouldn't turn hostile; they'd cooperate with me to catch Yoannis.

A criminal wizard recognized by a state agency, as the need arose.

Like the Seven Warlords of the Sea, the king's underlings, basically.

I just hoped no weirdo would show up shouting to abolish the Warlords.

Anyway, work had been coming in lately, my wallet was in good shape; it was a good peace.

"Ice Cream Mister, when's the next Christmas? It's soon, right?"

Just then, Min-hee, one of the orphans at Ellie's Church, came scurrying over.

"...Ellie's lying to me 'cause I'm little."

I gave her the truth straight.

"Christmas? It passed ages ago; it's a long way off. Why would Ellie lie to you?"

"Awwww...."

Min-hee turned and scurried off to cling to Ellie's leg.

"I think she must have really enjoyed last Christmas."

Ellie stroked Min-hee's hair and smiled warmly.

"She keeps asking when the next one is coming. I guess she wants it to hurry up and get here."

'Christmas, huh....'

Suddenly Soo-ah studied my face and asked, probing,

"What did you do last Christmas, mister? A date? With a woman?"

Ellie's ears perked up a little at that too.

".........."

I gave a noncommittal answer.

"I don't keep track, so who knows. Probably studied magic at home or did exorcist work."

I'd never really observed Christmas to begin with, but this past one especially, I'd been so swamped after becoming the grimoires' owner that I hadn't even realized it was Christmas until it had gone by.

Soo-ah said in a delighted voice,

"Hmm~ I knew it~."

Then she sidled up beside me and chattered on.

"Since you're so pitiful, I'll keep you company next Christmas~ Aren't you grateful?"

"Yeah, thanks."

'Christmas.'

I'd forgotten all about it, and now it had come back to me.

It was a day off, a big event day, so part-time gigs paid extra then, which was nice, but....

Yeah, honestly speaking, I didn't much care for Christmas.

It wasn't that I disliked Christmas itself.

It was that a personally humiliating memory was tied to it, and the association soured the whole thing for me.

It happened when I was five, after I'd been abandoned at the orphanage, during my first Christmas there.

The orphanage director at the time found looking after kids a hassle, so the solution was to darken the room and throw on a Christmas movie.

That day, I learned of the existence of Christmas and Santa for the first time.

'Christmas? Santa? Presents?'

And that night, before falling asleep in the dark room, I indulged in a ridiculous fantasy.

A fantasy where Santa appeared, bringing with him the woman who'd abandoned me.

'A Christmas present for little Yo-han~ from Santa!'

'Hehe~ It's Mama. I'm sorry it took me so long to come for you.'

...It only lasted a moment, but the mere fact that I'd entertained a fantasy like that was mortifying.

Min-hee beamed and said,

"Ice Cream Mister, did you get Christmas presents when you were little? I got one from Santa!"

I smiled faintly.

"This mister has been a mister since the day he was born, so Santa never gave him any presents."

"Whaaat!"

Min-hee trembled in shock.

In any case, to reset my mood, I returned to my peaceful breakfast.

And went back to watching the news.

[Breaking – Spontaneous Massacre Incident from the ○○ University district recurs.]

My mood promptly shifted, in a very different sense.

The calm inside me shattered.

It was a report of a person torn to shreds, all alone, in the middle of the street.

A case where the camera caught no attacker, only the sight of the victim being killed.

Naturally, obviously, I hadn't done it.

Which meant that incident was an imitation of what happened in the ○○ University district....

The work of a copycat.

My brow furrowed of its own accord, and my back teeth clenched.

'What kind of crazy bastard.'