Chapter 44 - The Swindler (5)

“What a pathetic little shit.”

The inner-core scam controversy had flared up like gasoline and burned out just as quickly. With Heavenly Demon and Sword Masta helping, and the admin delivering the finishing blow, it had ended without much trouble. Things would have been a little more complicated without their help, but fortunately, most of the registered users were on my side.

'Different world, same old forum.'

For the record, posting that response was entirely my own idea. Rather than a calmly worded explanation, it was a declaration of war laced with profanity. Anyone determined to tear me apart would do it no matter how I explained myself, so that was the approach I'd chosen.

In the end, I'd won both the forum users' goodwill and the battle for public opinion, so there was no downside. Honestly, the whole thing had burned through its fuel so fast that calling it a battle for public opinion was a stretch. Just another day on the forum.

'Heavenly Demon seemed a little taken aback, but it all worked out.'

Looking at the forum, most people were making a fuss about tracking down the scammer. Now that the admin had even revealed his address, his real life was bound to get rough. Of all the things that could happen, I'd never expected the admin to dox him.

My guess was that Heavenly Demon had persuaded the admin. She must have thought it unfair that my life was practically on the line while his wasn't.

'I should thank her first.'

Whatever the case, a thank-you was a must. I sent her a private message.

Thanks to you, everything went smoothly.

Thank you so much.

Heavenly Demon

It was nothing.

If I had my way, I would visit him myself and rip out his tongue.

Yikes... That's terrifying.

You're from the Central Plains, right, Heavenly Demon?

Heavenly Demon

Indeed.

Are you far from the address the admin posted?

Heavenly Demon

Quite far.

But I could arrive in no time.

Of course she could. I wasn't being sarcastic; I genuinely believed her. Surely she was at least on Sword Masta's level, if not higher.

After thanking Heavenly Demon for everything, I asked about something I'd been wondering.

Heavenly Demon.

Even as a moderator, once you make a direct trade, you can't make another for twenty-four hours, right?

Heavenly Demon

Correct. Do you perhaps long to trade with me more often?

“Long to” made it sound like I was desperately yearning for it. Not that it bothered me. That was simply how she talked, so I let it pass.

Yes. I think it'd be better to have important items authenticated before selling them from now on.

Someone could receive one and deny everything like that bastard did, right?

Heavenly Demon

I see what you mean.

You have my permission. I shall try persuading the admin about the trade cooldown.

Thank you. Seriously, thank you.

I'm always on the receiving end of your help.

Heavenly Demon

Could this possibly compare to your saving my life, my honored friend?

Tell me whenever you need help.

I appreciate the thought.

But I need to build the strength to stand on my own, too.

As I'd said time and again, dependence wasn't good. I would only ask Heavenly Demon to authenticate important items. For most other things, Allfather would tell me what they were if I posted about them, so this was a kind of insurance.

I'll get going, then.

I'll message you again next time.

Heavenly Demon

I shall always await your messages, my honored friend.

Oh, yes. I can have the fasting pills ready within a week.

Thank you.

Heavenly Demon

Of course. Whenever you need my strength, I shall help, so do not hesitate to contact me.

Was I imagining the fondness and reluctance to part in her words? She was lonely, so I ought to chat with her often.

Before that, though, I needed lunch. I turned on the hose just in case. Unfortunately, water gushed out freely. Nothing was blocking it.

'Guess I'll have to settle for a fasting pill.'

Disappointing, but there was no helping it. I couldn't fish in the river. Fishing was out of the question unless I wiped out every last golden frog. Chewing on a bitter fasting pill, I considered my plans for the afternoon.

'The trap... I'll check tomorrow. It's too soon now.'

Best not to get my hopes up about the trap. That left one thing: making a forum post. After what I'd experienced today, I intended to let everyone know my plans going forward.

Grylls here.

Wild Grylls

Hello, everyone. I'm Wild Grylls, the guy stranded in the Forest of Four Seasons.

Thanks to a certain piece of vermin today, I'll be getting important items authenticated before listing them from now on.

In particular, I probably won't list expensive items at the auction house. I'll try to sell those to registered users and only list them if that doesn't work out.

The forum really is a scary place. One person's life is at stake, while another can ruin them with a single click.

I've rambled on long enough. Anyway, I'll do everything I can to get out of the forest. That means I'll need the forum. Please keep cheering me on.

Oh! And thank you so much to Sword Masta for helping me. Go ahead and eat the inner core.

Three-line summary.

1. Registered users get first dibs on trades from now on.

2. The forum's scary, but I'll keep logging in so I can escape.

3. Thank you, Sword Masta.

└Whatever else, the three-line summary's the best part lol

└For real, all you need to read is the bottom lol

└Hang in there, Grylls. Just think of it as stepping in shit.

└Weren't you one of the guys trashing Grylls?

└Starlight Lady What a relief. I was so disappointed to see nothing but cruel people. Grylls even helps complete strangers.

└We call that being a sucker.

└Isn't that just being nice, not being a sucker?

└Besides, didn't he trade with Starlight Lady in the first place? Anyone who trades with you is a good person.

└Sword Masta Wait, seriously...? You're just dumping it on me. I don't need this.

└Wild Grylls Are you going to return it? You could just sell it.

└Sword Masta I have plenty of money. Besides, eating an inner core won't do much for me...

└Wild Grylls Don't caaare. Just take it, pretty pleeease.

└Sword Masta ...

└What the hell is this now lmaooo

└Not picking pockets, stuffing pockets lmaooo

└“Don't caaare,” he says lmao

As expected, Sword Masta was thoroughly flustered. I couldn't understand why she didn't want to get healthier. Starlight Lady had been desperate for her health, too. The world really felt unfair.

'Come to think of it, they say “dumping it on me” here too? Is she in the military?'

That would explain all the swordsmanship tips she gave me. It made sense. Speaking of swordsmanship, this seemed like a good chance to read her posts carefully. I trained hard, following Sword Masta's beginner swordsmanship guide.

'I'm sticking with the sword-and-board warrior build.'

Both the owlbear and the muscle mushroom had driven the point home. Having a shield was far safer than carrying only a sword. People on the forum teased me that I'd get one-shot anyway, but a shield was what could stop that one shot.

The clear fist imprint in my golden shield said it all. If my body had taken that blow, my organs would have burst.

'Though there's not much I can do about the proficiency issue.'

My swordsmanship itself was bound to plateau at some point. The difference between using one hand and two was night and day. In my situation, I had no choice but to sacrifice technique for safety. That would give me much better odds of survival. It wasn't optional; it was essential.

'Isn't there anyone who's good with a shield?'

Sword Masta focused on swordsmanship, with hardly any theory about shields. Basically, block and hit? I supposed that couldn't be helped. Well, I was still a beginner among beginners, so there was no rush.

'Let's see. Time the block carefully, then slash straight from there?'

I worked on my skills while carefully studying Sword Masta's posts until dinnertime. Of course, I didn't expect a dramatic improvement in just a few days. Besides, it had only been a few days since I'd first picked up a sword and shield. Getting used to them came first.

“Whew.”

I slowly steadied my breathing. Beads of sweat trickled down my cheeks. Even though I was practicing from her posts, I couldn't shake my doubts. Not about Sword Masta—her posts were credited with raising the continent's average combat ability. I simply couldn't tell whether I was doing it right. With nobody watching me, I felt a little uneasy.

'They say martial arts are hard without a teacher.'

Martial arts were techniques humanity had devised for combat. The study of how to fuck someone up more cleanly. There was a stark difference between an ordinary person's punch and a trained fighter's. Some mere brawler beating a martial artist? Complete bullshit.

That was how enormous the gap between trained and untrained was, and improving without a teacher's help was next to impossible. Naturally, I couldn't help wondering whether I was just swinging wildly.

'For now, all I can do is read Sword Masta's posts carefully and meet her targets.'

Sword Masta's posts didn't merely offer tips; they also set targets. Meet this target, and you could move on to the next stage. Tracing a straight line with the sword, making a certain number of cuts without breathing, thrusting into a long, hollow cylinder, and so on. Some targets sounded useful, while others were strange.

'I'll meet each target twice, three times, or more.'

Without a teacher, this was the best I could do. I had to make up for it with effort. I steadily practiced my sword-and-shield techniques until dinnertime, even visualizing how to subdue opponents more efficiently.

“Hah!”

How long had I been working at it? I was drenched in sweat. That ought to do it. Setting down my sword and shield, I went into the cave. I planned to rest in its cool interior for a while before eating dinner.

'Come to think of it, what happened to that scammer? Someone said they lived right in the next town.'

Curious, I immediately logged into the forum. Nothing beat it for relaxing. As always, the forum was a gathering place for idiots. I'd better check the top posts. As soon as I opened that section, I spotted one with an unusually high number of upvotes. It was about me. Naturally, I clicked it.

It's a real inner core lmaooo

The scamming bastard was in the next town, so I barged in and ate the inner core.

Some other guys showed up too, but I managed to be the one to eat it and check. Went straight from a measly Second-Rate to Peak.

Grylls wasn't the scammer. The merchant bastard was. No more slandering Grylls.

└So damn jealous. You didn't kill each other?

└Nah, the authorities might've shown up, so we settled it with rock-paper-scissors.

└Rock-paper-scissors lmaoooo

└Don't knock rock-paper-scissors. Tracking motion with your eyes is seriously important in that game lol

└Didn't you ask the merchant what he thought?

└Why would we give a shit what a scammer thinks?

└Guess I need to buy everything Grylls puts up at auction now.

└Fuck, before this he would've listed stuff without going through registered users. Now I'm pissed.

└What's the scammer doing now? He must be mad.

└What's he gonna do about it? I ran right away lmaooo

└Serves him right lmaooo

Somehow, things seemed to have worked out nicely(?). It looked like nobody would mistake me for a scammer again. That didn't mean I would go straight back to listing things at auction. As I'd said earlier, registered users would get priority.

After browsing the forum, I stood up, my sweat having cooled. It was starting to get dark, so I intended to check the trap.

'It'd be nice if I caught something.'

Not even a day had passed. Maybe I was being greedy. But a little greed was how you got a hearty dinner. After some simple preparations, I headed for the trap. Before leaving, I made sure to ask the speed-sloth to watch the house.

“Oh?”

As soon as I approached the trap, a change caught my eye. All the grass I'd laid over the panel was gone. What's more, I could sense a very faint presence beneath it.

'Caught something!'

It looked like I'd finally get some meat in me. Full of anticipation, I slowly lifted the panel.

“Da-da-da~ Da-da-daa~ Oom-pah-pah~ Oom-pah...”

CLUNK

“Oom-pah...”

There was... no rabbit in the trap. Something else was in there instead. It was large enough to fill the enormous pit, with striking, pitch-black hair. It wasn't even an ordinary animal. This thing had a full eight legs. Worse, miniature versions were clustered all around it. Its young, apparently.

“...”

CLUNK

I carefully lowered the panel. Apparently, I'd dug a spider's nest, not a trap.

'... Maybe I could roast that instead?'

I abandoned the idea immediately. A bite might kill me.